April 02, 2010

Gimme some peace and quiet!

My upstairs neighbour loves to renovate. For five years, he's lived in the flat above me, hammering, sawing, drilling, sanding, tinkering. Out of the two hundred and sixty weeks I've known him, he has spent maybe a whole of three not doing any handiwork around either his flat or the block I live on.

Many a Saturday morning, I've groggily been awoken by his renovating something directly above me. No sooner have I stumbled to the kitchen then he's outside, re-paving the shared driveway, walking back and forth past my window, looking in each time until I respond with a wave and begrudged smile.

NB: I'm sorry, but I believe, on the weekend, you should only acknowledge neighbours once they are showered and/or dressed - you do not peer into their damn window whilst they're still in their dressing gown making breakfast. Even if it is noon. It's just rude.

Of course, once I'm awake, showered, dressed, and ready to leave my flat, my renocrazy neighbour is in the shared stairwell, vacuuming, or drilling something that doesn't need drilling but he has the drill out anyway, so he may as well. If he's not in the stairwell, then he's out in the 'garden' re-mulching, or trimming the hedge - anything to keep himself super busy.

He's a lovely guy, if not a bit of a content middle-class suburbanite (nice for some, dull for me). He just really needs a shed and a house to tinker with, not a tiny flat directly above me. Thankfully, he's bought one! Yay!

Now he's 'preparing his flat for market'. That means a mad rush of more renovations before he finally leaves. A week ago, I was awoken to what sounded like a shovel being scraped repeatedly over concrete, directly above my head - soon found out he's re-carpeting his entire flat. He's also 'tidying' up the whole block as only he knows how: loudly. Right now, he's gardening...with power tools. It's a public holiday, I'm recovering from a bad illness, I just want to sleep and he's got the leaf-blower out.

What I really want is some peace and quiet. I'm hoping whoever buys the flat is a very quiet, non-renovator. I may need to take some action to be sure of this. This is what I'm thinking of:



If you ever get to watch the whole episode of the above (Men Behaving Badly, Season 3, Episode 'Casualties'), do. The lads spend most of the episode going to great lengths to put off prospective buyers of the flat above them. I think I need to go watch it again myself, just to refresh! In the meantime, my neighbour has appeared to have gone in for lunch...I can hear his radio...ah! Finally! A bit of quiet time. For now...

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